CHICKEN: A Tale of Two Breasts

Dear Naughty Curry crew,
   

     I have a confession to make; I'M AFRAID OF THE KITCHEN.  (If I can't microwave it, chances are I will not make it.) 

    Which brings me to the reason I am writing you.  I have a challenge.  If you can come up with a simple recipe that I can make on a poor graduate students budget, I'd be willing to try it. Here's some information about me so you can find the perfect recipe.  I'm addicted to chicken, and my favorite spice is salt.  I have somewhat of a "Minnesota Palate", but I'm willing to add some spice into my life.  So, can you help me and my bored taste buds?
                                              -- Erik Motscoe

   

     To this chicken-crazed, Minnesota-bred Mr. Motscoe, we at the NC say: challenge accepted.

     Okay, let's cut the crap. I know Erik. He's a home boy from back in the day -- my brother Brady's best friend since the sixth grade, his Best Man, yadda yadda yadda. And by some cosmic coincidence of circumstance, Erik just chanced upon the Naughty Curry website (or my brother just flat out told him about it).

     About Erik: Let me serve you up a slice. He is one of those people that, like, everybody likes (see last post on charisma). He appeals to all genres of people, not by actually trying, but by virtue of just being Erik. (Can we say...Homecoming King 1998? I'd like to dislike him just for that, but hey-- it's Erik.) He's quirky enough to  find brilliant humor in Brady Bunch: The Movie, but 'mainstream' enough to hang with my brother Brady, who is the main-est stream.

     And so his confession of  'chicken addiction' makes poetic sense. Chicken, like Erik, 'fits in' with a multitude of dishes. Chicken is likeable, chicken is unpretentious. Chicken is what we compare unknown meats with when we want to convey acceptance. If entered in a meat-popularity contest, chicken would be elected Homecoming King. Like Erik.

     Yet chicken is also the name we give people when they're being, well, chicken....

     I sense in Erik's email an undercurrent of urgency.  It could be that Erik is afraid of becoming what he eats.  For chicken, left to its own devices, is monumentally bland. I think Erik here is desperately reaching out, reaching out for something to counteract this encroaching force.

     You were right to come to the NC, Erik.  Because spice can conquer your demons.

     What do you say, kids ~  should we help Erik? Is that a yes?

     OK, bro, today is the day. You are about to get spiced.

     No, no, Erik! Get back here. I'm just messin' with you, amigo-- don't be afraid. Trobee and I are going to make your first time with spicing very safe, very agreeable (there's even a microwave involved). You might even have a little fun if you would just relax. Trobee says to have confidence.

     Now then. I want you to go out in the world and bring home some breasts (though today we'll only be focusing on two). As for the spices, I am going to introduce you to the primary two: cumin and coriander (paprika I'm sure you've met before). Normally, I insist on buying spices at an ethnic grocer. But for today, for you, go on and get them from the supermarket, along with lemon juice if you don't already have some.

     Do this now, Erik. Go.

     When you return, we'll get started.

---

Two Breasts Two Spices Two Methods

     Erik, Trobee and I agree that this is the way for you to begin. She wants you to  know that even though the spicing here is simple, she couldn't keep her hands off this chicken after she cooked it up today.

     Let's get down to it: We're going to show you two ways, using the same ingredients, to amplify the mojo of your chicken breasts (Yes, the frozen kind from in a bag). Don't be nervous --  we're gonna talk you though this.

     And we have two objectives.

Objective 1: To come home from work and quickly whip up some good chicken to go with your (fill in the blank here).

Objective 2: To 'learn' the foundation spices cumin and coriander, which are as the heart of the so-called Indian curry flavor.

You'll need:

• 1 frozen chicken breast
• lemon juice
• salt
• 1/2 tsp cumin powder
• 1 tsp coriander powder
• 1/4 tsp paprika

Version One ("johnny-on-the-spot"):

1. Defrost the chicken in the microwave.
2. Mix the spices and salt together and coat the chicken breast. Get out your small skillet and add a dab of oil, the chicken breast and cover it.
3. Cook for about 3-5 minutes, then spritz in some lemon juice to keep the breast happy and moist.
4. Turn it over and repeat. Cover it again and cook it through.

Version Two ("the marinade"):

1. In a Ziploc bag,add 1 tablespoon of lemon juice, salt, the spices, then the (still-frozen) breast. You can stick it in the freezer until the day you want it.
2. Then in the morning, just stick it in the fridge to thaw and interact with the flavors while you go about your day.
3. When its dinner time,  just cook it up as in Version One.

     If this experiment ends up successful for you, things can be made even easier with a bit of forethought. 

     You can prepare several breasts like this to have on hand in the freezer. In ten minutes or so, a bold n' sassy breast can be hot n' ready just for you. (Sounds good, huh?)

     And there you have  it, Erik. The very start of the  spicing yellow brick road. Of course, being that you have a few safety issues, it is likely that you'll never make it out of Munchkin-land.  But that's OK -- Munchkin-land is a happy little place.

      And at least no one will ever call you a...

     Oh never mind.      

photo by Mo Digital and Trobee